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Solomon, also, speaking of the naughty person and "He winketh with his eyes, he "He that winketh with the

wicked man, says, speaketh with his feet.”

eye causeth shame." How often do we see this winking, and speaking by gestures and knowing looks, when the characters of others are under discussion! Open and unreserved evil-speaking is unchristian; but this winking, this speaking with the feet, is mean and dishonorable. Whenever you perceive a disposition to make invidious remarks about others, refuse to join in the conversation, and manifest your decided disapprobation. "The north wind driveth away rain; so doth an angry countenance a backbiting tongue." Bear in mind the words of the apostle James: "If any man among you seemeth to be religious, and bridleth not his tongue, but deceiveth his own heart, this man's religion is vain." Thus the habitual indulgence of this sin will cut off the hope of the loudest professors.

8. Avoid speaking of yourself. Vanity and selfishness lead people to make themselves and their own affairs the principal topics of conversation. This is treating others with great disrespect, as though one's self were of more consequence than the whole company. Endeavor to keep yourself as much as possible out of view, and to direct the thoughts and conversation of the company away from personal affairs to intellectual, moral, and religious subjects. But, when any of your friends make known their difficulties to you, manifest an interest in their affairs, sympathize with them, and render them all the assistance in your power.

9. Never indulge a suspicious disposition. Many

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A SUSPICIOUS DISPOSITION.

persons destroy their own peace, and gain the ill-will of others, by the exercise of this unhappy temper. You have no right to think others dislike you until they have manifested their dislike. Accustom yourself to repose confidence in your associates. It is better to be sometimes deceived, than never to trust. And, if you are always jealous of those around you, be sure you will soon alienate their affections. In your intercourse with others of your own age and sex, be willing always to advance at least half way; and with those whose habits are very retiring, you may even go farther. Many persons of sterling worth have so low an opinion of themselves as to doubt whether even their own equals wish to form an acquaintance. "A man that hath friends must show himself friendly." Always put the best construction upon the conduct of others. Do not attach more meaning to their language and conduct than they properly express. If at any time you really believe yourself slighted, take no notice of it. Yet be careful never to intrude yourself into society where you have good reason to believe your company is not desired.

10. Be cautious in the formation of intimate friendships. Christians should always regard one another as friends. Yet peculiar circumstances, together with congeniality of sentiment and feeling, may give rise to a personal attachment much stronger than the common bond which unites all Christians. Of this we have a beautiful example in the case of David and Jonathan. This appears to be a perfect pattern of Christian friendship. They both, doubtless, loved other pious people;

INTIMATE FRIENDSHIPS.

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but there was existing between them a peculiar personal attachment. Their souls were 66 knit together." Friendships of this kind should not be numerous, and the objects of them should be well chosen. Long acquaintance is necessary, that you may be able to repose unlimited confidence in the friend to whom you unbosom your whole heart. Form no such friendships hastily. Think what would have been the consequence if David had been deceived in this friend. He would certainly have lost his life.

11. Before going into company, visit your closet. Pray that the Lord would so direct your steps that you may do all things for his glory; that he would enable you to spend the time profitably to yourself and others; that he would keep you from evil-speaking, levity, foolish jesting, and every other impropriety; and that he would enable you to honor him, and exert a good influence upon others. Endeavor to go out in a serious, devout, and tender frame of mind; and then you may expect the Lord will go with you. But, if you go with a careless, undevout spirit, you will return with a wounded soul.

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CHAPTER XVIII.

MARRIAGE.

SOME young persons indulge a fastidiousness of feeling in relation to the subject of marriage, as though it were indelicate to speak of it. Others make it the principal subject of their thoughts and conversation; and yet seem to think it must never be mentioned but in jest. Both these extremes should be avoided. Marriage is an ordinance of God, and therefore a proper subject of thought and discussion, with reference to personal duty. It is a matter of great importance, having a direct bearing upon the glory of God and the happiness of individuals. It should, therefore, never be approached with levity. But, as it requires no more attention than what is necessary in order to understand present duty, it would be foolish to make it a subject of constant thought, and silly to make it a common topic of conversation. It is a matter which should be weighed deliberately and seriously by every young person. In reference to the main subject, two things should be considered.

I. Marriage is desirable. It was ordained by the Lord at the creation, as suited to the state of man as a social being, and necessary to the design for which he was created. There is a sweetness and comfort in the

MARRIAGE DESIRABLE.

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bosom of one's own family, which can be enjoyed nowhere else. In early life, this is supplied by our youthful companions, who feel in unison with us. But, as a person who remains single advances in life, the friends of his youth form new attachments, in which he is incapable of participating. Their feelings undergo a change, of which he knows nothing. He is gradually left alone. No heart beats in unison with his own. His social feelings wither for want of an object. As he feels not in unison with those around him, his habits also become peculiar, and perhaps repulsive, so that his company is not desired: hence arises the whimsical attachment of such persons to domestic animals, or to other objects which can be enjoyed in solitude. As the dreary winter of age advances, the solitude of this condition becomes still more chilling. Nothing but that sweet resignation to the will of God, which religion gives in all circumstances, can render such a situation tolerable. But religion does not annihilate the social affections; it only regulates them. It is evident, then, that, by a lawful and proper exercise of these affections, both our happiness and usefulness may be increased.

II. On the other hand, do not consider marriage as absolutely indispensable. Although it is an ordinance of God, yet he has not positively enjoined it upon all. The apostle Paul intimates that there may be, with those who enter into this state, a greater tendency of the heart towards earthly objects, as well as an increase of care: "The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body

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