« PreviousContinue »
of idleness and dissipation, enlisted as a soldier in the left to his care and discretion, he actually bespoke service of the East India Company; that in the course the company of a French marquis, an Italian count, of duty he had the good fortune to attract the notice and a German baron, whom he knew to be egregious and approbation of Lord Clive, who preferred him coxcombs, and therefore more likely to enhance the from one step to another till he had attained the rank joy of the entertainment. of captain and paymaster to the regiment, in which Accordingly, the hour being arrived, he conducted capacities he had honestly amassed above twelve them to the hotel where the physician lodged, after thousand pounds, and at the peace resigned his com- having regaled their expectations with an elegant mission. He had sent several remittances to his meal in the genuine old Roman taste; and they were father, who received the first only, consisting of one received by Mr Pallet, who did the honours of the hundred pounds; the second had fallen into the house while his friend superintended the cook below. hands of a bankrupt; and the third had been con- By this communicative painter, the guests understood signed to a gentleman in Scotland, who died before that the doctor had met with numerous difficulties it arrived, so that it still remained to be accounted in the execution of his design ; that no fewer than for by his executors. He now presented the old man five cooks had been dismissed, because they could not with fifty pounds for bis present occasions, over and prevail upon their own consciences to obey his direcabove bank notes for one hundred, which he had depo- tions in things that were contrary to the present sited for his brother's release. He brought along with practice of their art; and that, although he had at him a deed, ready executed, by which he settled a last engaged a person, by an extraordinary premium, perpetuity of fourscore pounds upon his parents, to to comply with his orders, the fellow was so astonished, be inherited by the other two sons after their decease. mortified, and incensed at the commands he had He promised to purchase a commission for his youngest received, that his hair stood on end, and he begged brother; to take the other as his own partner in a on his knees to be released from the agreement he manufacture which he intends to set up to give em- had made; but finding that his employer insisted ployment and bread to the industrious ; and to give upon the performance of his contract, and threatened five hundred pounds, by way of dower to his sister, to introduce him to the commissaire if he should who had married a farmer in low circumstances. tinch from the bargain, he had, in the discharge of Finally, he gave fifty pounds to the poor of the town his othee, wept, sung, cursed, and capered, for two where he was born, and feasted all the inhabitants whole hours without intermission. without exception.
While the company listened to this odd informaMy uncle was so charmed with the character of tion, by which they were prepossessed with strange Captain Brown, that he drank his health three times notions of the dinner, their ears were invaded by a successively at dinner. He said he was proud of his piteous voice, that exclaimed in French, ' For the love acquaintance; that he was an honour to his country, of God! dear sir, for the sake of all the saints, spare and had in some measure redeemed human nature me the mortification of the honey and oil! Their from the reproach of pride, selfishness, and ingratitude. ears still vibrated with the sound, when the doctor For my part I was as much pleased with the modesty entering, was by Peregrine made acquainted with the as with the filial virtue of this honest soldier, who strangers, to whom he, in the transports of his wrath, assumed no merit from his success, and said very could not help complaining of the want of complailittle of his own transactions, though the answers he sance he had found in the Parisian vulgar, by which made to our inquiries were equally sensible and laco his plan had been almost entirely ruined and set aside. nic. Mrs Tabitha behaved very graciously to him, The French marquis, who thought the honour of his until she understood that he was going to make a ten- nation was concerned at this declaration, professed his der of his hand to a person of low estate, who had sorrow for what had happened, so contrary to the estabeen his sweetheart while he worked as a journeyman blished character of the people, and undertook to see
Our aunt was no sooner made acquainted the delinquents severely punished, provided he could with this design, than she starched up her behaviour | be informed of their names or places of abode. The with a double portion of reserve; and when the com- mutual compliments that passed on this occasion were pany broke up, she observed, with a toss of her nose, scarce finished, when a servant, coming into the room, that Brown was a civil fellow enough, considering the announced dinner; and the entertainer led the way into lowness of his origin ; but that fortune, though she another apartment, where they found a long table, or had mended his circumstances, was incapable to raise rather two boards joined together, and furnished with his ideas, which were still humble and plebeian.* a variety of dishes, the steams of which had such cri
dent effect upon the nerves of the company that the [Feast in the Manner of the Ancients.]
marquis made frightful grimaces, under pretence of
taking snuff; the Italian's eyes watered, the German's [From Peregrine Pickle.']
visage underwent several distortions of feature ; our Our young gentleman, by his insinuating behaviour, hero found means to exclude the odour from his sense acquired the full confidence of the doctor, who invited of smelling by breathing only through his mouth; him to an entertainment, which he intended to pre
and the poor painter, running into another room, pare in the manner of the ancients. Pickle, struck plugged his nostrils with tobacco. The doctor him with this idea, eagerly embraced the proposal, which selt, who was the only person then present whose orhe honoured with many encomiums, as a plan in all gans were not discomposed, pointing to a couple of respects worthy of his genius and apprehension ; and couches placed on each side of the table, told his the day was appointed at some distance of time, that guests that he was sorry he could not procure the the treater might have leisure to compose certain exact triclinia of the ancients, which were somewhat pickles and confections, which were not to be found different from these conveniences, and desired they among the culinary preparations of these degenerate would have the goodness to repose themselves without days.
ceremony, each in his respective couchette, while he With a view of rendering the physiciun's taste and his friend Mr Pallet would place themselves upmore conspicuous, and extracting from it the more
right at the ends, that they might have the pleasure diversion, 'Peregrine proposed that some foreigners which the strangers had no previous idea, disconcerted
of serving those that lay along. This disposition, of should partake of the banquet ; and the task being and perplexed them in a most ridiculous manner; the
* This is a true story, the only alteration being in the name marquis and baron stood bowing to each other on of the hero, which, in reality, was White.-ED.
pretence of disputing the lower seat, but, in reality,
with a view of profiting by the example of each other, admirer, supplied himself with a pigeon, therein confor neither of them understood the manner in which forming to the choice of our young gentleman, whose they were to loll; and Peregrine, who enjoyed their example he determined to follow through the whole confusion, handed the count to the other side, where, course of the entertainment. with the most mischievous politeness, he insisted upon The Frenchman having swallowed the first spoonful, his taking possession of the upper place.
made a full pause; his throat swelled as if an egg had In this disagreeable and ludicrous suspense, they stuck in his gullet, his eyes rolled, and his mouth uncontiuued acting a pantomime of gesticulations, until derwent a series of involuntary contractions and dilathe doctor earnestly entreated them to waive all com- tations. Pallet, who looked steadfastly at this conpliment and form, lest the dinner should be spoiled noisseur, with a view of consulting his taste before before the ceremonial could be adjusted. Thus con- he himself would venture upon the soup, began to be jured, Peregrine took the lower couch on the left-hand disturbed at these emotions, and observed, with some side, laying himself gently down, with his face towards concern, that the poor gentleman seemed to be going the table. The marquis, in imitation of this pattern into a fit; when Peregrine assured him that these (though he would have much rather fasted three days were symptoms of ecstacy, and, for further confirthan run the risk of discomposing his dress by such an mation, asked the marquis how he found the soup. attitude), stretched himself upon the opposite place, It was with infinite difficulty that his complaisance reclining upon his elbow in a most painful and awk- could so far master his disgust as to enable him to ward situation, with his head raised above the end of answer, ‘Altogether excellent, upon my honour! And the couch, that the economy of his hair might not the painter, being certified of his approbation, lifted suffer by the projection of his body. The Italian, the spoon to his mouth without scruple; but far from being a thin limber creature, planted himself next to justifying the eulogium of his taster, when this prePickle, without sustaining any misfortune but that cious composition diffused itself upon his palate, he of his stocking being torn by a ragged nail of the seat, seemed to be deprived of all sense and motion, and as he raised his legs on a level with the rest of his sat like the leaden statue of some river god, with the limbs. But the baron, who was neither so wieldy nor liquor flowing out at both sides of the mouth. supple in his joints as his companions, flounced him- The doctor, alarmed at this indecent phenomenon, Belf down with such precipitation, that his feet, sud- earnestly inquired into the cause of it; and when denly tilting up, came in furious contact with the Pallet recovered his recollection, and swore that he head of the marquis, and demolished every curl in a would rather swallow porridge made of burning brintwinkling, while his own skull, at the same instant, stone than such an infernal mess as that which he descended upon the side of his couch with such vio- had tasted, the physician, in his own vindication, lence, that his periwig was struck off, and the whole assured the company that, except the usual ingrediroom filled with pulvilio.
ents, he had mixed nothing in the soup but sonie salThe drollery of distress that attended this disaster amoniac, instead of the ancient nitrum, which could entirely vanquished the affected gravity of our young not now be procured; and appealed to the marquis gentleman, who was obliged to suppress his laughter whether such a succedaneum was not an improvement by cramming his handkerchief in his mouth; for the on the whole. The unfortunate petit-maitre, driven bareheaded German asked pardon with such ridicu- to the extremity of his condescension, acknowledged lous confusion, and the marquis admitted his apology it to be a masterly refinement; and deeming himself with such rueful complaisance, as were sufficient to obliged, in point of honour, to evince his sentiments awake the mirth of a Quietist.
by his practice, forced a few more mouthfuls of this This misfortune being repaired, as well as the cir- disagreeable potion down his throat, till his stomach cumstances of the occasion would permit, and every was so much offended that he was com pelled to start one settled according to the arrangement already de- up of a sudden, and in the hurry of his elevation scribed, the doctor graciously undertook to give some overturned his plate into the bosom of the baron. account of the dishes as they occurred, that the com- The emergency of his occasions would not permit him pany might be directed in their choice; and, with an to stay and make apologies for this abrupt behaviour, air of infinite satisfaction, thus began :- This here, so that he flew into another apartment, where Pickle gentlemen, is a boiled goose, served up in a sauce found him puking and crossing himself with great composed of pepper, lovage, coriander, mint, rue, an- devotion ; and a chair at his desire being brought to chovies, and oil! I wish, for your sakes, gentlemen, the door, he slipped into it more dead than alive, it was one of the geese of Ferrara, so much celebrated conjuring his friend Pickle to make his peace with among the ancients for the magnitude of their livers, the company, and in particular excuse him to the one of which is said to have weighed upwards of two baron, on account of the violent fit of illness with pounds; with this food, exquisite as it was, did the which he had been seized. It was not without reason tyrant Heliogabalus regale' his hounds. But I beg that he employed a mediator; for when our hero repardon, I had almost forgot the soup, which I hear turned to the dining-room, the German had got up, is so necessary an article at all tables in France. At and was under the hands of his own lacquey, who wiped each end there are dishes of the salacacabia of the the grease from a rich embroidered waistcoat, while Romans; one is made of parsley, pennyroyal, cheese, he, almost frantic with his misfortune, stamped upon pinetops, honey, vinegar, brine, eggs, cucumbers, the ground, and in high Dutch cursed the unlucky onions, and hen livers ; the other is much the same banquet, and the impertinent entertainer, who all as the soup-maigre of this country. Then there is a this time, with great deliberation, consoled him for loin of boiled veal with fennel and caraway seed, on the disaster, by assuring him that the damage might a pottage composed of pickle, oil, honey, and flour, be repaired with some oil of turpentine and a hot and a curious hashis of the lights, liver, and blood of iron. Peregrine, who could scarce refrain from laugha hare, together with a dish of roasted pigeons. Mon-ing in his face, appeased his indignation by telling sieur le Baron, shall I help you to a plate of this him how much the whole company, and especially soup! The German, who did not at all disapprove of the marquis, was mortified at the accident; and the the ingredients, assented to the proposal, and seemed unhappy salacacabia being removed, the places were to relish the composition ; while the marquis, being filled with two pies, one of dormice liquored with asked by the painter which of the silly-kickabys he sirup of white poppies, which the doctor had substichose, was, in consequence of his desire, accommodated tuted in the room of toasted poppy-seed, fornierly with a portion of the soup-maigre; and the count, in eaten with honey as a dessert; and the other comlieu of spoon meat, of which he said he was no great posed of a hock of pork baked in honey.
Pallet, hearing the first of these dishes described, wine and herring-pickle, which he had used instead lifted up his hands and eyes, and with signs of loath of the celebrated garum of the Romans; that famous ing and amazement, pronounced, ' A pie made of dor- pickle having been prepared sometimes of the scombri, mice and sirup of poppies : Lord in heaven! what which were a sort of tunny fish, and sometimes of the beastly fellows those Romans were !' His friend silurus or shad fish ; nay, he observed, that there was checked him for his irreverent exclamation with a a third kind called garum hæmation, made of the severe look, and recommended the veal, of which he guts, gills, and blood of the thynnus. himself cheerfully ate with such encomiums to the The physician, finding it would be impracticable to company that the baron resolved to imitate his ex- re-establish the order of the banquet by presenting ample, after having called for a bumper of Burgundy, again the dishes which had been discomposed, ordered which the physician, for his sake, wished to have been everything to be removed, a clean cloth to be laid, the true wine of Falernum. The painter, seeing no- and the dessert to be brought in. thing else upon the table which he would venture to Meanwhile he regretted his incapacity to give them touch, made a merit of necessity, and had recourse to a specimen of the alieus or fish-meals of the ancients; the veal also; although he could not help saying, such as the jus diabaton, the conger eel, which, in that he would not give one slice of the roast beef of Galen's opinion, is hard of digestion ; the cornutá or Old England for all the dainties of a Roman em- gurnard, described by Pliny in his Natural History, peror's table. But all the doctor's invitations and who says the horns of many of them were a foot and assurances could not prevail upon his guests to honour a half in length; the mullet and lamprey, that were the hashis and the goose ; and that course was suc- in the highest estimation of old, of which last Julius ceeded by another, in which he told them were divers Cæsar borrowed six thousand for one triumphal sup of those dishes which among the ancients had ob- per. He observed that the manner of dressing them tained the appellation of politeles, or magnificent. was described by Horace, in the account he gives of
That which smokes in the middle,' said he, 'is a the entertainment to which Mæcenas was invited by sow's stomach, filled with a composition of minced the epicure Nasiedenus, pork, hog's brains, eggs, pepper, cloves, garlic, anniseed, rue, ginger, oil, wine, and pickle. On the right- Affertur squillos inter Murena natantes, &c. hand side are the teats and belly of a sow, just farrowed, fried with sweet wine, oil, flour, lovage, and and told them, that they were commonly eaten with pepper.
On the left is a fricassee of snails, fed or the thus Syriacum, a certain anodyne and astringent rather purged with milk. At that end, next Mr Pal- seed, which qualified the purgative nature of the fish. let, are fritters of pompions, lovage, origanum, and Finally, this learned physician gave them to underoil; and here are a couple of pullets, roasted and stand, that though this was reckoned a luxurious stuffed in the manner of Apicius.'
dish in the zenith of the Roman taste, it was by no The painter, who had by wry faces testified his ab- means comparable in point of expense to some prehorrence of the sow's stomach, which he compared to parations in vogue about the time of that absurd a bagpipe, and the snails which had undergone pur- voluptuary Heliogabalus, who ordered the brains of gation, no sooner heard him mention the roasted pul- six hundred ostriches to be compounded in one mess. lets, than he eagerly solicited a wing of the fowl ; By this time the dessert appeared, and the company upon which the doctor desired he would take the were not a little rejoiced to see plain olives in salt trouble of cutting them up, and accordingly sent them and water ; but what the master of the feast valued round, while Mr Pallet tucked the tablecloth under himself upon, was a sort of jelly, which he attirmed to his chin, and brandished his knife and fork with sin- be preferable to the hypotrimma of Hesychius, being a gular address; but scarce were they set down before inixture of vinegar, pickle, and honey, boiled to a him, when the tears ran down his cheeks, and he proper consistence, and candied assafoetida, which he called aloud, in a manifest disorder, ‘Zounds! this is asserted, in contradiction to Aumelbergius and Lister, the essence of a whole bed of garlic! That he might was no other than the laser Syriacum, so precious as not, however, disappoint or disgrace the entertainer, to be sold among the ancients to the weight of a silhe applied his instruments to one of the birds; and ver penny. The gentlemen took his word for the exwhen he opened up the cavity, was assaulted by such cellency of this gum, but contented themselves with an irruption of intolerable smells, that, without stay- the olives, which gave such an agreeable relish to the ing to disengage himself from the cloth, he sprung wine that they seemed very well disposed to console away with an exclamation of 'Lord Jesus !' and in themselves for the disgraces they had endured ; and volved the whole table in havoc, ruin, and confu- Pickle, unwilling to lose the least circumstance of sion.
entertainment that could be enjoyed in their company, Before Pickle could accomplish his escape, he was went in quest of the painter, who reinainel in his sauced with a sirup of the dormice pie, which went penitentials in another apartment, and could not be to pieces in the general wreck: and as for the Italian persuaded to re-enter the banqueting room, until count, he was overwhelmed by the sow's stomach, Peregrine undertook to procure his pardon from those which, bursting in the fall, discharged its contents whom he had injured. Having assured him of this upon his leg and thigh, and scalded him so miserably indulgence, our young gentleman led him in like a that he shrieked with anguish, and grinned with a criminal, bowing on all hands with an air of humility most ghastly and horrible aspect.
and contrition; and particularly addressing himself The baron, who sat secure without the vortex of this to the count, to whom he swore in English he had tumult, was not at all displeased at seeing his com- no intent to affront man, woman, or child, but was panions involved in such a calamity as that which he fain to make the best of his way, that he might not had already shared ; but the doctor was confounded give the honourable company cause of offence by with shame and vexation. After having prescribed obeying the dictates of nature in their presence. an application of oil to the count's leg, he expressed When Pickle interpreted this apology to the Italian, his sorrow for the misadventure, which he openly Pallet was forgiven in very polite terms, and even reascribed to want of taste and prudence in the painter, ceived into favour by his friend the doctor in consewho did not think proper to return and make an quence of our hero's intercession ; so that all the apology in person; and protested that there was no- guests forgot their chagrin, and paid their respects so thing in the fowls which could give offence to a sen- piously to the bottle, that in a short time the chamsible nose, the stuffing being a mixture of pepper, paigne produced very evident effects in the behaviour lovage, and assafoetida, and the sauce consisting of of all present.
pleted the first part of his Journey,' Sterne went to London to see it published, and died in lodgings
in Bond Street, March 18, 1768. There was nobody Next in order of time and genius, and not inferior but a hired nurse by his death-bed. He had wished in conception of rich eccentric comic character, was to die in an inn, where the few cold offices he the witty, pathetic, and sentimental author of Tris- wanted would be purchased with a few guineas, and tram Shandy. Sterne was an original writer, though paid to him with an undisturbed but punctual ata plagiarist of thoughts and illustrations. Brother tention. His wish was realised almost to the letter. Shandy, my Uncle Toby, Trim, the Widow Wad- No one reads Sterne for the story: his great work man, and Dr Slop, will go down to posterity with is but a bundle of episodes and digressions, strung the kindred creations of Cervantes. This idol of together without any attempt at order. The reader his own day is now, however, but little read, except must give up the reins of his imagination into his in passages of pure sentiment. His broad humour author's hand-be pleased he knows not why, and is not relished ; his oddities have not the gloss of cares not wherefore. Through the whole novel, novelty; his indecencies startle the prudish and however, over its mists and absurdities, shines his correct. The readers of this busy age will not hunt little family band of friends and relatives—that inifor his beauties amidst the blank and marbled leaves mitable group of originals and humorists—which -the pages of no-meaning—the quaint erudition, stand out from the canvass with the force and disstolen from forgotten folios—the abrupt transitions tinctness of reality. This distinctness and separate and discursive flights in which his Shakspearean identity is a proof of what Coleridge has termed touches of character, and his gems of fancy, judg- the peculiar power of Sterne, of seizing on and ment, and feeling, lie hid and embedded. His spark- bringing forward those points on which every man ling polished diction has even an air of false glitter, is a humorist, and of the masterly manner in which yet it is the weapon of a master-of one who can he has brought out the characteristics of two beings stir the heart to tears as well as laughter. The of the most opposite natures—the elder Shandy and want of simplicity and decency is his greatest fault. Toby-and surrounded them with a group of folHis whim and caprice, which he partly imitated lowers, sketched with equal life and individuality: from Rabelais, and partly assumed for effect, come in the Corporal, the obstetric Dr Slop; Yorick, the in sometimes with intrusive awkwardness to mar lively and careless parson; the Widow Wadman the touches of true genius, and the kindlings of en- and Susannah. During the intervals of the publithusiasm. He took as much pains to spoil his own cation of “Tristram,' Sterne ventured before the natural powers by affectation, as Lady Mary says public some volumes of Sermons, with his own comic Fielding did to destroy his fine constitution. figure, from a painting by Reynolds, at the head of
The life of LAURENCE Sterne was as little in them. The . Sermons, according to the just opinion keeping as his writings. A clergyman, he was dis- of Gray the poet, show a strong imagination and a solute and licentious; a sentimentalist, who had, sensible heart; “but,' he adds, you see the author with his pen, tears for all animate and inanimate often tottering on the verge of laughter, and ready nature, he was hardhearted and selfish in his con- to throw his periwig in the face of the audience.'
duct. Had he kept to his living in the country, The affected pauses and abrupt transitions which 1 going his daily round of pastoral duties, he would disfigure • Tristram' are not banished from the 'Ser
have been a better and wiser man. “He degene- mons,' but there is, of course, more connection and rated in London,' says David Garrick, like an ill. coherency in the subject. The “Sentimental Jourtransplanted shrub: the incense of the great spoiled ney' is also more regular than ‘Tristram’ in its plan his head, and their ragouts his stomach. He grew and details; but, beautiful as some of its descriptions sickly and proud-an invalid in body and mind.' are, we want the oddities of Shandy, and the everHard is the life of a wit when united to a suscep- pleasing good nature and simplicity of Uncle Toby. tible temperament, and the cares and sensibilities of Sterne himself is the only character. The pathetic an author! Sterne was the son of an Irish lieu- passages are rather overstrained, but still finely tenant, and was born at Clonmel, November 24, conceived, and often expressed in his most felicitous 1713. He was educated by a relation, a cousin, and manner. That 'gentle spirit of sweetest humour, took his degree of M.a. at Cambridge in 1740. who erst didst sit upon the easy pen of his beloved Haring entered into orders, his uncle, Dr Sterne, a Cervantes, turning the twilight of his prison into rich pluralist, presented him with the living of Sut- noonday brightness,' was seldom absent long from ton, to which was afterwards added a prebend of the invocations of his English imitator, even when York. He married a York lady, and derived from he mounted his wildest hobby, and dabbled in the the connexion another living in that county, the mire of sensuality. rectory of Stillington. He lived nearly twenty Of the sentimental style of Sterne (his humour is years at Sutton, reading, painting, fiddling, and too subtle and ethereal to be compressed into our shooting, with occasional quarrels with his brethren limits) a few specimens are added. of the cloth, with whom he was no favourite. He left Yorkshire for London in 1759, to publish the
The Story of Le Fevre. two first volumes of Tristram Shandy.' Two others were published in 1761, and the same num
[From "Tristram Shandy.') ber in 1762. 'He now took a tour to France, which It was some time in the summer of that year in enriched some of his subsequent volumes of “Tris- which Dendermond was taken by the allies, which tram' with his exquisite sketches of peasants and was about seven years before my father came into vine-dressers, the muleteer, the abbess and Mar- the country, and about as many, after the time, that garita, Maria at Moulines—and not forgetting the my uncle Toby and Trim had privately decamped pour ass with his heavy panniers at Lyons. In from my father's house in town, in order to lay some 1764 he took another continental tour, and pene of the finest sieges to some of the finest fortified cities trated into Italy, to which we are indebted for his in Europe, when my uncle Toby was one evening Sentimental Journey. The latter work he composed getting his supper, with Trim sitting behind him at on his return at Coxwould, the living of which had a small sideboard, I say sitting, for in consideration been presented to him, on the first publication of of the corporal's lame knee (which sometimes gave *Tristram,' by Lord Falconbridge. Having com- him exquisite pain), when my uncle Toby dined or
supped alone, he would never suffer the corporal to bring on your honour's torment in your groin. I fear stand; and the poor fellow's veneration for his master so, replied my uncle Toby; but I am not at rest in was such, that, with a proper artillery, my uncle Toby my mind, Trim, since the account the landlord has could have taken Dendermond itself with less trouble given me. I wish I had not known so much of this than he was able to gain this point over him; for affair, added my uncle Toby, or that I had known many a time, when my uncle Toby supposed the cor- more of it. How shall we manage it? Leare it, an't poral's leg was at rest, he would look back and detect please your honour, to me, quoth the corporal. I'll him standing behind him with the most dutiful take my hat and stick and go to the house and reconrespect. This bred more little squabbles betwixt noitre, and act accordingly; and I will bring your thein than all other causes for five-and-twenty years honour a full account in an hour. Thou shalt guy together; but this is neither here nor there—why do Trim, said my uncle Toby; and here's a shilling for I mention it? Ask my pen-it governs me—1 govern thee to drink with his servant. I shall get it all out not it.
of him, said the corporal, shutting the door. He was one evening sitting thus at his supper, My uncle Toby filled his second pipe; and had it when the landlord of a little inn in the village came not been that he now and then wandered from the into the parlour with an empty pbial in his hand, to point, with considering whether it was not full as well beg a glass or two of sack. Tis for a poor gentleman to have the curtain of the tennaile a straight line as
think of the army, said the landlord, who has a crooked one, he might be said to have thought of been taken ill at my house four days ago, and has nothing else but poor Le Fevre and his boy the whole never held up his head since, or had a desire to taste time he smoked it. anything, till just now, that he has a fancy for a glass It was not till my uncle Toby had knocked the of sack and a thin toast ; I think, says he, taking his ashes out of his third pipe that Corporal Trim rehand from his forehead, it would comfort me. If I turned from the inn, and gave him the following could neither beg, borrow, nor buy such a thing, added account. I despaired at first, said the corporal, of the landlord, I would almost steal it for the poor being able to bring back your honour any kind of gentleman, he is so ill. I hope in God he will still intelligence concerning the poor sick lieutenant. I mend, continued he ; we are all of us concerned for he in the army, then? said my uncle Toby. He is, him.
said the corporal. And in what regiment ! said my Thou art a good-natured soul, I will answer for uncle Toby. I'll tell your honour, replied the corthee, cried my uncle Toby; and thou shalt drink the poral, everything straightforwards as I learned it. poor gentleman's health in a glass of sack thyself; Then, Trim, I'll fill another pipe, said my uncle and take a couple of bottles with my service, and tell Toby, and not interrupt thee till thou hast done ; so him he is heartily welcome to them, and to a dozen sit down at thy ease, Trim, in the window seat, and more if they will do him good.
begin thy story again. The corporal made his old Though I am persuaded, said my uncle Toby, as bow, which generally spoke as plain as a bow could the landlord shut the door, he is a very compas- speak it-Your honour is good. And having done sionate fellow, Trim, yet I cannot help entertaining a that, he sat down, as he was ordered ; and begun the high opinion of his guest too ; there must be some story to my uncle Toby over again in pretty near the thing more than common in him that in so short a same words. time should win so much upon the affections of his I despaired at first, said the corporal, of being able host. And of his whole family, added the corporal; to bring back any intelligence to your honour about for they are all concerned for him. Step after him, the lieutenant and his son ; for when I asked wbero Baid my uncle Toby; do, Trim; and ask if he knows his servant was, from whom I made myself sure of
knowing everything which was proper to be asked-I have quite forgot it, truly, said the landlord, That's a right distinction, Trim, said my uncle Toby coming back into the parlour with the corporal ; but I was answered, an’ please your honour, that he had I can ask his son again. Has he a son with him, no servant with him; that he had come to the ima then ! said my uncle Toby. A boy, replied the land with hired horses, which, upon finding himself unable lord, of about eleven or twelve years of age ; but the to proceed (to join, I suppose, the regiment), he bed poor creature has tasted almost as little as his father; dismissed the morning after he came. If I get better, he does nothing but mourn and lament for him night my dear, said he, as he gave his purse to his son to and day. He has not stirred from the bedside these pay the man, we can hire horses from hence. But, two days.
alas ! the poor gentleman will never get froin hence, My uncle Toby laid down his knife and fork, and said the landlady to me; for I heard the deathwatch thrust his plate from before him, as the landlord gave all night long: and when he dies, the youth, his sce, him the account; and Trim, without being ordered, will certainly die with him; for he is broken-hearted took it away, without saying one word, and in a few already. minutes after brought him his pipe and tobacco. I was hearing this account, continued the corporal,
Stay in the room a little, said my uncle Toby. when the youth came into the kitchen, to order the Trim! said my uncle Toby, after he lighted his pipe, thin toast the landlord spoke of. But I will do it for and smoked about a dozen whiffs. Triin came in my father myself, said the youth. Pray, let me sate front of his master, and made his bow. My uncle you the trouble, young gentleman, said I, taking up Toby smoked on, and said no more. Corporal! said a fork for the purpose, and offering him my chair to my uncle Toby. The corporal made his bow. My sit down upon by the fire whilst I did it. I beliere, sir
, uncle Toby proceeded no further, but finished his said he, very modestly, I can please him best myself
I am sure, said I, his honour will not like the tease Trim, said my uncle Toby, I have a project in my the worse for being toasted by an old soldier
. The head, as it is a bad night, of wrapping myself up warm youth took hold of my hand, and instantly burst into in my roquelaure, and paying a visit to this poor tears. Poor youth! said my uncle Toby; he has been gentleman. Your honour's roquelaure, replied the cor- bred up from an infant in the army, and the name of poral, has not once been had on since the night before a soldier, Trim, sounded in his ears like the name of your honour received your wound, when we mounted a friend ; I wish I had him here. guard in the trenches before the gate of St Nicholas. I never, in the longest march, said the corporal, had And besides, it is so cold and rainy a night, that so great a mind to my dinner, as I had to cry what with the roquelaure, and what with the weather, him for company. What could be the matter with 'twill be enough to give your honour your death, and me, an' please your honour ? Nothing in the world,