vice produces in the person who is actually under its dominion, it has also a bad influence on the mind even in its sober moments; as it insensibly weakens the understanding, impairs the memory, and makes those faults habitual which are produced by frequent excesses. I should now proceed to show the ill effects which this vice has on the bodies and fortunes of men ; but these I shall reserve for the subject of some future paper. No. 570. WEDNESDAY, July 21, 1714. Author unknown. -Nugaque canora. Chiming trifles. THERE HOR. Ars. Poet. v. 322. ROSCOMMON. HERE is scarce a man living who is not actuated by ambition. When this principle meets with an honest mind and great abilities, it does infinite service to the world; on the contrary, when a man only thinks of distinguishing himself without being thus qualified for it, he becomes a very pernicious or a very ridiculous creature. I shall here confine my self to that pretty kind of ambition, by which some men grow eminent for odd accomplishments and trivial performances. How many are there whose whole reputation depends upon a pun or a quibble? You may often see an artist in the streets gain a circle of admirers by carrying a long pole upon his chin or forehead in a perpendicular posture. Ambition has taught some to write with their feet and others to walk upon their hands. Some tumble into fame, and others grow immortal by throwing themselves through a hoop; Cætera de genere hoc adeo sunt multa, loquacem HOR. Sat. 1. 1. 1. v. 13. With thousands more of this ambitious race, HORNECK. I am led into this train of thought by an adventure I lately met with. I was the other day at a tavern, where the master of the house accommodating us himself with every thing we wanted, I accidentally fell into a discourse with him; and talking of a certain great man, who shall be nameless, he told me, that he had sometimes the honor to treat him with a whistle; adding (by the way of parenthesis)" for you must know, gentlemen, that I whistle the best of any man in Europe." This naturally put me upon desiring him to give us a sample of his art; upon which he called for a case-knife, and applying the edge of it to his mouth, converted it into a musical instrument, and entertained me with an Italian solo. Upon laying down the knife, he took up a pair of clean tobacco-pipes; and after having slid the small end of them over the table, in a most melodious trill, he fetched a tune out of them, whistling to them at the same time in concert. In short, the tobacco-pipes became musical-pipes in the hands of our virtuoso, who confessed to me ingenuously, he had broke such quantities of them, that he had almost broke himself before he had brought this piece of music to any tolerable perfection. I then told him I would bring a company of friends to dine with him next week, as an encouragement to his ingenuity; upon which he thanked me, saying that he would provide himself with a new frying-pan against that day. I replied, that it was no matter; roast and boiled would serve our turn. He smiled at my simplicity, and told me, that it was his design to give us a tune upon it. As I was surprised at such a promise, he sent for an old frying-pan, and grating it upon a board, whistled to it in such a melodious manner, that you could scarce distinguish it from a bass-viol. He then took his seat with us at the table; and hearing my friend that was with me hum over a tune to himself, he told him if he would sing it out he would accompany his voice with a tobacco-pipe. As my friend has an agreeable bass, he chose rather to sing to the frying-pan :: and indeed between them they made up a most extraordinary concert. Finding our landlord so great a proficient in kitchen-music, I asked him if he was master of the tongs and key. He told me that he had laid it down some years since, as a little unfashionable; but that, if I pleased, he would give me a lesson upon the gridiron. He then informed me that he had added two bars to the gridiron, in order to give it a greater compass of scund; and I perceived was as. well pleased with the invention, as Sappho could have been upon adding two strings to the lute. To be short, I found that his whole kitchen was furnished with musical-instruments, and could not but look upon this artist as a kind of burlesque musician. He afterwards, of his own accord, fell into the imitation of several singing-birds. My friend and I toasted our mistresses to the nightingale, when all of a sudden we were surprised with the music of the thrush. He next proceeded to the sky-lark, niount-. ing up by a proper scale of notes, and afterwards fal ling to the ground with a very easy and regular descent. He then contracted his whistle to the voice of several birds of the smallest size. As he is a man of a larger bulk and higher stature than ordinary, you would fancy him a giant when you looked upon him, and a tom-tit when you shut your eyes. I must not omit acquainting my reader, that this accomplished person was formerly the master of a toyshop near Temple-Bar; and that the famous Charles Mathers was bred up under him. I am told that the misfortunes which he has met with in the world are chiefly owing to his great application to his music : and therefore cannot but recommend him to my readers as one who deserves their favor, and may afford them great diversion over a bottle of wine, which he sells at the Queen's Arms, near the end of the little piazza in Covent-garden. As the work I have engaged in will not only con sist of papers of humor and learning, but of several essays moral and divine, I shall publish the following one, which is founded on a former Spectator, and sent me by a particular friend, not questioning but it will please such of my readers as think it no dispa ragement to their understandings to give way sometimes to a serious thought. "SIR, "In your paper of Friday the 9th instant, you had occasion to consider the ubiquity of the Godhead; and at the same time to show, that as he is present to every thing, he cannot but be attentive to every thing, and privy to all the modes and parts of its existence, or, in other words, that his omniscience and omnipresence are co-existent, and run together through the whole infinitude of space. This consideration might furnish us with many incentives to devotion, and motives to morality; but as this subject has been handled by several excellent writers, I shall consider it in a light wherein I have not seen it placed by others. "First, How disconsolate is the condition of an intellectual being who is thus present with his Maker, but at the same time receives no extraordinary benefit or advantage from this his presence! "Secondly, How deplorable is the condition of an intellectual being, who feels no other effects from this his presence, but such as proceed from divine wrath and indignation! "Thirdly, How happy is the condition of that intellectual being, who is sensible of his Maker's presence from the secret effects of his mercy and lovingkindness! "First, How disconsolate is the condition of an intellectual being who is thus present with his Maker, but at the same time receives no extraordinary benefit or advantage from this his presence! Every particle of matter is actuated by this Almighty Being which passes through it. The heavens and the earth, |