With a jeweller; and, if my judgment err not, What says your lordship to this diamond? Rol. Does it not sparkle nost divinely, signior? Peren. This box is studded like a frosty night with stars. Rol. You have outbid their value; make me a gainer In changing them for your commands. Peren. How, sir? Rol. I'm serious. Rol. You have a noble soul, I'll teach you how to merit more. Peren. I am covetous of such a knowledge. Rol. Make but my path a smooth one to the Princess I am brief, you know my undertaking. Peren. So I should be a traitor? Rol. It comes not near the question of a life; do't, I'll enable you to buy another dukedom, state, and title. Peren. Although 'twere necessary in the affairs Of such high consequence to deliberate, Yet for this once l'll be as brief as you ; I wo'not do't. Morel. And you go there too, save yourself, you are in a worse pickle than we are. Dond. And how is't w' ye, signior? Grut. Do you thrive in your hopes? Rol. I do not despair, gentlemen; you see I do not wear my hat in my eyes, crucify my arms, or intreat your lordship's brain to melt in a petition for me. Morel. I did but jest, I know you have a way to the wood in your pericranium, what is 't? we are honest, simple-minded lords. Rol. I think so. Grut. Nay, nay, impart. Dond. We tell no tales. Morel. Wou'd we were whip'd an' we do. Rol. Why, shall I tell you?-You are threeMorel. Very secret Rol. Coxcombs. All three. How? Rol. A miserable leash of court mimics. Rol. You perfumed goats! Morel. Oh, is that it? I never heard what a mimic was before. Rol. D'ye think I am so wretched, in a point that concerns my life and honour, to trust my ways and purposes to you that have no souls? Dond. No souls! Moret. Peace, how comes he to know that? Grut. Why, hast thou none? Morel. 'Twas more than ever I could see in myself yet. Rol. Things that have forfeited their creation; and, had not your tailors took compassion on you, you had died to all men's thoughts, who long since wou'd have forgotten that ever there were such things in nature. Dond. Shall we suffer this? Rol. Yes, and make legs, in token of your thankfulness. If I were at leisure, I would make you shew tricks now. Morel. Do I look like a jackanapes? Morel. It were not your best course. Morel. Alas, sir, I should but shame myself, and be laugh'd at 'fore all this company. Rol. When you see me next, avoid me as you would do your poor kindred when they come to court. Get you home, say your prayers, and wonder that you come off without beating, for 'tis one of my miracles. [Exit. Morel. Had we not better a' gone to tavern, as I plotted at first? he could not have been more valiant in his drink. Grut. I'm glad he's gone. Dond. I know not what to make on him. Morel. Make on him, quotha! he made little reckoning of us, and he had not gone as he did, I should ha' made Dond. What? Morel. Urine in my breeches--he squeezed ine, I think I was ready to melt o' both sides. Grut. But harkee you, signior, we forget the ladies still. Morel. Well remembered. Dond. Let's consult to purpose about that shall we? Morel. No, every one think what he can by him_self, my thoughts shall be private, and not free at this time; every one scratch his own head. Grut. And he that gets the first hint, communicate Dond. A match. Morel. Let me see- -hum, Dond. What if I did-nothing, my brains are dull. Grut. Ten to one, but if I did—let it alone, a pox on't; I were best drink some sack, they say it helps invention. Morel. O rare! Both. Rub, rub, out with it. Morel. No, 'tis gone back again, I drank butter'd sack this morning, and it slipt back when 'twas almost at my tongue's end-but it was a delicate project, whatsoever it was. Grut. Recover it with thy finger.? Morel. Now, now, now, let me alone-make Enter BONAMICO. Bonam. Save you, signiors. Pray whereabouts is the sign of the invisible man? [Erit. Dond and Grut. The invisible man! Bonam. Cry ye mercy, now I see it. Dond. See't! he does more than we can. The gentleman's mistaken; here's no such sign. Yet he went in there. Grut. He has better eyes than we to distin- Ser. This, ay, this is it. Ser. Then, by the sign, this is the house whither I am going to enquire for a gentleman that teaches men to walk invisible. Grut. That would be seen. This is news. Ser. News! either you have slept long, or you are gentlemen of very small intelligence. Exa mine the next paper you see advanced, and inform yourselves. Farewell, gallants. [Exit. Dond. He's entered there too. Grut. Teach men to walk invisible! a very fine trade. Grut. Lose it not, thou art great with wit; let other device to get in to the ladies. us deliver thee. What is't? Dond. Would 'twere true; we should desire no Morel. Some wiser than some [They follow him up and down for discovery. Dond. Wilt not tell us? Grut. Didst not promise? Morel. No haste-as occasion serves-it cost more than so, yet you may know't. Dond. Well said. Re-enter BONAMICO and Servant to the House. Grut. 'Tis impossible-See, see, more gentlemen! Pr'ythee let's to him; this will be a trick worth our learning. Dond. Stay, we are not acquainted, let's knock Ser. Your pleasures, gentlemen? Grut. Man! I see no man. Ser. Right, sir, and he's behind it; the man's invisible. Dond. Pretty faith; it may be the man i'the moon for aught we know. Ser. Would ye any thing with my master? say. Ser. He is the only professor of the miraculous invisible art. Dond. May we change a little discourse with him? Ser. There are some gentlemen with him; but 7 Recover it with thy finger-i, e, make yourself sick, by putting your finger down your throat, and so bring it up again. S. I'll tell him. I am prevented, he's coming forth himself. Enter BONAMICO. Dond. Signior Altomaro, I take it. Bonam. 'Tis my name, sir, a poor artist, not warm in these parts of Italy. Grut. And you were not too busy, sir,Bonum. Please you walk in. I am now alone; your persons will grace my poor habitation. Dond. We saw four or five enter but now. Bonam. I ha' dispatched 'em, they are fresh departed. Dond. Which way? Grut. Here's not a man. Are they not sunk? Bonam. Upon my credit, sir, no other way. Grut. This man can do't, I see already, and-- Bonam. That of the Ring too, ha' ye not? 10 at secret counsels, betray letters, see how such a lord paints his thighs, this perfume his breath, t'other marshal his fine French teeth, see this statesman's eyes put out with a bribe, how that officer cozens the duke, and his secretary abuses 'em both, this lawyer take fees o' both sides, while the judge examines the fertility and price of the manor before the witnesses, and then decrees who shall have the land? Would you see Justice employ her scales to weigh light gold, that comes in for fees or corruption, and flourish with her sword, like a fencer, to make more room for causes i'the court-- Dond. All this and more may be done, if we can but go invisible; but how can you assure us of that? I would fain see any man go invisible Bonam. My head only visible, and hanging in the air like a comet. Dond. That were a strange sight. Bonam. Sometimes nothing shall be seen but my arm; another while one of my legs, hopping without a body. Grut. This is admirable. Bonam. When I please, I will have nothing conspicuous but my hand, nay, perhaps my little finger. Dond. Do not you conjure then? Grut. Come, you will cast a mist before our eyes. Bonam. 'Tis a mystery indeed, but a safe one, signiors. Bonam. The one was magic, and t'other an imposture; what I do is by art, fair and natural. Are you in debt, and fear arresting? you shall save your money in protections, come up to the face of a serjeant, nay, walk by a shoal of these mankind horse-leaches, and be mace-proof.? If you have a mind to rail at 'em, or kick some o' their loose flesh out, they sha'not say black's your eve, nor with all their lynx's eyes discover you. Would you see, when the mercer's abroad, how his man plays the merchant at home with his mistress' silkworm, and deals underhand for commodity; would yourself talk with a lady in secret, sit down, play with her, ravish a diamond from her finger, and bind her soft wrist with a bracelet, kiss her abroad, at home, before her servants, in the presence of her jealous husband, nay, truss her up, when the tame lord is a-bed with her, and to his eyes be undiscovered as the wind, signior? Do you suspect your mistress plays double? Would you hear how she entertains t'other's love, and know what she does i'the clo-sible. set with the smooth page? Would you be present Dond. Why, look you, sir, if you will be pleased that we may see you first walk invisible, we shall not only credit your art, but, at any rate, be ambitious to be your disciples. Bonam. Why, gentlemen, you speak but justice, you shall have experiment. I will be invisible first, but as t'other in this kind, I will not demonstrate without half in hand. Let me have fifty crowns apiece; I'll point you a day when I will be invi Grut. Can you not do it presently? That of the Ring tro-This is the comedy of The Two merry Milkmaids, or, The best Words weare the Garland. By J. C. 1620. 9 Mace-proof-Brainworm, in Every Man in his Humour, when in the disguise of a serjeant, or bailiff, says, "A kind of little kings we are, bearing the diminutive of a mace, made like a young artichoke, that always carries pepper and salt in itself." 10 Black's your eye-The same phrase is in Stubbs's Anatomie of Abuses, 1595, p. 65.-" Then having estraunged themselves thus for a small space, they returne againe, not to their pristine cursed life, (1 dare say,) but to their countrey, and then no man say blacke is their eie, but all is wel, and they as good Christians, as those that suffer them unpunished." The expression is even yet to be heard among the vulgar. Bonam. Ouly my hand; you shall touch it, see every line in it, and the rest of my body be to you invisible. This will require a little time for preparation; and when, with the consent of your eyes and understaudings, I keep my promise in this point, you will think your money is well expended to be taught the mystery. Dond. This is very fair. Grut. The crowns are ready, sir. Enter ROLLIARDO. Bonam. At your own pleasures.-Ha, Rolliardo! I must not be seen, gentlemen. Both. Farewell, incomparable signior-what Jack had we to light upon this artist! he shall not publish it; we'll buy the whole secret at any vafue, and then get him remove into some other province.-Who is this? Rol. Am not I mad ?—sure I am, though I do not know it; and all the world is but a Bedlam, a house of correction, to whip us into our senses. I have known the time when jewels and gold had some virtue in them; the generation of men now are not subject to corruption. Democritus, the world is refined. Dond. It is Rolliardo; he looks melancholy, let us have a fling at him.-Give you joy of the great lady, sir: which is the next way to the moon, pray? Rol. Bolt upright, musk-cat; and if you make haste, you may be one of her calves: next time she appears, you shall see her beckon to you, with a pair of horns, just of the size of those are preparing for your forehead, my precious animal. Dond. Ha, ha, ha! the fellow's mad. Grut. Can you tell, sir, what became of all the swallows, cuckoos, and small birds, we had here last summer? Rol. Marry, sir, they went to sea, to avoid the cranes, and there have been mustering ever since; but for want of a woodcock they have left behind them, they dare not venture upon the pygmies: you may do well to overtake the buzzard, and relieve the army, sir. Grut. Ha, ha, ha ! Erit. Rol. I shall be grinned to death, as I walk the streets it is no policy to be dull and inodest. But let me see, which way to compass my work, and put myself out of the common laughter; the very children will jeer me shortly I think, and point me out with stones, the precious underta Had I another life, I'd undertake yet, For fear I should refuse the sport you brought me Grut. Not I, sir, you shall excuse me, 'twas the last thing I did. 2 Court. In the position general, I'll not touch him, For money may be said to purchase all things; But to aspire to my good sovereign's daughter Of blessed memory Rol. She's not dead, I hope. 2 Court. There gold and trash was impudently inferred, And 'twas a task too insolent: in that point You'd willingly give a pound of your proud flesh To be released. Rol. I heard a pound of flesh," a Jew's demand once : 'Twas gravely now remembered of your lordship--released! Fortune, and courtesy of opinion, Is my chief glory, that, perhaps, being sprung Than e'er your souls were; and that hour I die, I mean for any terror,-you shall think him Ambas. A brave resolution! Duke. Be this the prologue to the mirth; my lord Attends to entertain you; set on, we'll leave him. Ha, ha, ha! [Exeunt. RoL. pulls FULv. back. Rol. Sir, I observed you noble, and not apt SCENE I. Enter Guard. Rol. You've honoured me-Married to Tuscany?-So, if my ambition had been fortunate, I might have been his taster; but my stars want influence, they are too dull, and weary of my fate.-Rolliardo then must forfeit: why that's the worst on't; I will make a glorious blaze in death, and while I live make the duke's treasury pay for it: nor shall he accuse me I exhaust him poorly; I'll study out some noble way to build me a remembrance. Ha!-a church or college! tedious, my glass has but few sands; I must do something I may live to finish:-I ha't; I will send to all the prisons i'the city, and pay the poor men's debts for them: the world wants such a precedent. I ha' money enough: since I fail in my other ends, I will do some good deeds before I die, so shall I be more sure of prayers than if I built a church; for they are not certain to continue their foundation. Fate, I despise thee: I sink under no cheap and common action, but sell my life to fame, in catching my death by so brave an aspiring. If I obtain a monument, be this all Writ on my grave; This man climbed high to fall. [Exit ACT III. 1 Guard. Come, gentlemen, we must watch still, that none run away with the princess. 2 Guard. He must have an excellent stomach, that can break these stone-walls to come to her. 3 Guard. Beside this moveable wall of flesh, which we carry. 2 Guard. One makes towards us.~'Tis a lady. Enter MORELLO, like a Lady. Morel. So, now am I as valiant as Hercules when he turned spinster. Great Jupiter, the patron of 'scapes, assist my petticoat, and at my return I will sacrifice my linen-breeches to thee.-Here be the men, the men of metal:-now, Venus, I be !! I heard a pound of flesh, &c.-See The Merchant of Venice. 12 My slave to take my upper garment off-If the unjust censure, which Dryden had passed on our author did not preclude every idea of his having read the works of the latter, the sameness of the words here used, with those put into the mouth of Creon in Edipus, A., would tempt one to suppose, that Mr Dryden had this line in his mind, when he wrote Creon's description of conscience: ""Tis my slave, my drudge, my supple glove, My upper garment, to put on, throw off, The first and third acts of Œdipus were written by Mr Dryden. See Defence of the Duke of Guise. VOL. I. 2 G |